


Ain't No Sound (But the Sound of His Feet)

by stellectrum



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: 5+1, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-09-30
Updated: 2012-09-30
Packaged: 2017-11-15 07:45:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/524861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellectrum/pseuds/stellectrum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The most tragic misconception is that Clint Barton is the quiet one, the dark, brooding type. The team soon discovers the trick is getting him to shut up.</p><p>Or, 5 times Clint's singing bothered the team, and 1 time it didn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ain't No Sound (But the Sound of His Feet)

**1\. Tony**

Doom decided to recreate the Chitauri’s Leviathans with _science_ , and ended up with enormous, genetically altered sea turtles with steely armor, the ability to fly, and a taste for human flesh. It’s not one of his best moments, but the result is pretty terrifying nonetheless. Orders given and strategies somewhat composed, the team splits off to charge into battle. Steve and Natasha cover the ground, kicking and punching and throwing things with superhuman strength and accuracy. It's possible Natasha isn't actually human, Tony thinks, as she flips off of Steve's shield to land atop a Leviathan 2.0's head and stab it in the eye. Thor is hammer-happy as always, and Hulk is smashing away. All in all, it's nothing too new for them. Tony’s got the aerial view, repulsors searching for weak spots in a turtle of death’s armor, when he hears a familiar tune humming through his earpiece. 

“ _…and another one gone, and another one gone…_ ” An arrow descends from Clint’s rooftop perch and detonates not an inch away from the side of a nearby creature. It roars as the explosion hits, and Clint whoops and- did he just somersault off the railing?- the singing gets louder.

“ _Another one bites the dust,_ ” he belts as he loads up another arrow, head bobbing to his own rhythm. “ _Hey, I’m gonna get you too! Another one bites the dust…_ ” Each line is punctuated by the boom of another arrow followed by some obscene dance move. The sight is both ridiculous and inspiring. As it is not yet 8 in the morning on a Monday, Tony decides on ridiculous.

“Hey, Freddie Mercury, it’s too early for this. Save it for the shower,” he shouts back. Clint smirks at him in that I’m-a-walking-innuendo way, but eventually shuts up. 

It’s not until later, when the whole team has every Queen song _ever_ stuck in their heads, that Tony decides to hate him.

**2\. Natasha**

It's a quiet night, somewhat of a rarity nowadays, and Natasha takes advantage of the alone time to train her skills even further to precision. Left, right, roll, toss, and the throwing stars hit their marks, red hair whipping her face as she snaps her head around to watch each weapon land. She's tired and she's breathing hard, but her senses are still razor sharp, and she doesn't miss the sound of scuffling feet outside the door. She continues throwing, eyes locked on her targets, ears trained on the door.  
It's definitely Clint, and he definitely knows she can hear him. He's singing to himself, words indistinct through the closed door. A few minutes go by this way, with Clint amusing himself outside and Natasha ignoring him inside, when there's a near-silent creak from the turning door handle. Natasha hears it almost before it happens and keeps herself from reacting just as quickly. Another throw. Suddenly, Clint's head is peeking into the room as his song gets louder. He's baiting her, and she tries not to let it distract her. Two more throws and a roll off the mats.

Natasha doesn't snap until his off-key cry of " _She's a super freak-_ " and she lets a throwing star fly. It pierces the wood of the door frame, and Clint lets out a high pitched shriek. The door slams shut and the footsteps scuffle away.

 **3\. Thor**  
Thor is quite proud of his Asgardian status. In fact, he makes this well-known whenever appropriate and/or possible. It is a hot, dull Friday night, and the team has nothing better to do than to give in to Thor's pleas of a party, Asgardian style. ("So what, like Gods Gone Wild or something?" "No, Tony.") It is for this reason that on this particular Friday night, Thor has mead in his beard and tears in his eyes as he regales his comrades with traditional tales and songs of his people.

He's a little more tipsy than planned (and that's tipsy in god terms, mortals). Natasha grasped her sobriety by the throat and refused to let go, Tony is strewn across a couch snoring, Bruce had to remove himself from the situation twenty minutes ago, and Steve is watching television, side-eyeing them all with a blank look on his face. No one even knows about Clint. His inebrity sadly remains neither confirmed or denied when he starts mimicking every line Thor sings. Naturally, Thor sees this as a challenge, and proceeds to boom out each verse with twice the strength as before. Clint follows suit. 

This goes on for fifteen more minutes. They manage to wake Tony up, which can only be classified as a miracle. Steve's death grip on the remote tightens. A few rooms down, Bruce's door slams, loud and ominous. Natasha does _absolutely nothing_. 

After so much time, the noise becomes just that, only noise. They tune out the sound as much as they can, and the words all blend together and lose their meaning. Thor's neverending song has reached its pinnacle, the high note to end all high notes. It is god-knows-what-o'clock in the morning, and a third of Earth's mightiest heroes are red in the face from belting said note. Then it all happens, instantaneously and simultaneously. Bruce hulks out. Steve's grip shatters the remote. Tony flips a table and walks out. Natasha pushes a strand of hair away from her face, scooting a foot or two away from her musical couchmates. Thor now sees Clint's persistence as not a challenge, but an attack to his talent and ego. He lets out a thunderous roar, shuts his mouth abruptly, and leaves the room. It is the calm after the storm, the awkward silence following an attack on their eardrums. One by one, they gradually get up and leave, too.

Clint is the only one without a headache in the morning.

**Author's Note:**

> I zoned out during math class, and this was the result, scribbled into my notes. This is mostly unedited, unrevised, and unbeta'd, so corrections or comments are welcome and encouraged! I have zero knowledge of anything Marvel outside of the movieverse, so please correct me if I have not picked an adequate villain for certain situations.
> 
> I was going to split these up into chapters, but they were so short by themselves. I decided to just number them all in one big post. That being said, I am still in the process of updating. I'll figure this out eventually, stay with me!


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